CoLd...

i am feeling realy cold + hungry now...er..wait..i've just eaten 1 chocolate-filled waffle, mee soto and 4 sushis...arghh!!!i am getting fat!!!i don't know what's wrong with me these days..been eating alot...i just can't stop eating...
anyway..had my COMANA 2nd test & Tribon test this morning...thankfully..i managed to most of the questions thanks to Jit who happen to be sitting beside me..hehehe as for Tribon..i only managed to complete the pipe drawing..haiz..oh well..what's done is done..just hope i can pass the module with an A..hahha as if...
hmm..tomorrow i have an interview for my technical writing and MENG1 cct..hope i can pass..hopefully..hahha
anyway..i got to go...need to finish up my practical reports..
adious!!!

My pain...

arghh....it was terrible...the test i mean...my mind went completely blank...i can't think straight...i am so going to fail COMANA...oh well..there's another test tomorrow..hope i can just get through it...hmm..at the library now...arghh...it's going to rain today..yippey!!!hahha because...i'm wearing shoes today!!!yeay!!!it's been a long time since my toes been squashed...hahha
ate chicken chop at SIM today with Razia & Amin...just 3 teens laughing & chatting while having lunch together...it's was a great feeling...it definitely lifted my mood today...
i don't know why but i been thinking about death alot these days...i can't wait for death to come...i jst can't carry on living anymore...no..don't get me wrong...i'm not heartbroken or anything...and i definitely love my life as it is..just that...i don't know how to explain...MAYBE i've sinned enough for last 19yrs of my life...and i just can't carry on sinning...haiz..i don't know..i love my family...i love my friends..and i definitely love him...i'm content with what i have now...but something's missing...the enthusiasm to carry on living...before this i used to dream about what's going to happen...i used to daydream alot...now i don't...i'm afraid...haiz...this is so depressing...how i wished i could make the pain just go away...

280904

1 word:
BORING

Tua Tak Sadar Diri....

ola...i'm sooo sleepy right now...got home pretty late last night..attended the Mrs Singapore & Mrs Singapore Classic pageant yesterday evening..it was HORRIBLE!!especially for the classic category..looking at all the "tak-sadar-diri-nyonyas" parading on stage make me want to PUKE...euwww...Oh..you guys must be wondering why i was there in the 1st place...well..one of my sister-in-law-to-be-if-it-does-happen took part in the Mrs Singapore category...she was one of the 26 finalist that night...cool!!!ok..to cut it short...i think the whole even suck!!!big time..the judges are BLIND...the food SUCKS...the winners are LOSERS..sheeshhh...nonetheless...i enjoyed myself.."kutuk-ing" and making fun of the old nyonyas @ the events..hahha i guess that's all for now..i'm hungry...need FOOD....

Maybe i should just stop...

i am feeling really down...was reading Lydy's blog...the song on her blog was so heart wrenching but at the same time so enticing...i almost teared...it's a song by Shiela On 7 - Berhenti Mengharap...somehow..deep within me...i feel like giving up too...i'm sick of living...it's too depressing..i can't seem to be able to think straight...i can never be happy for long...the things that made me happy never stayed for long...maybe it's the song...or is it just me?..i can never figure out..try listening to the song..i'm sure you feel the same too.. below's the lyric...


PS: Lydy..if you're reading this..sorry if i kinda rob you of the song..it's so beautiful..i just have to share it with..sorry.. :)

Shiela on 7 - Berhenti Berharap

aku tak percaya lagi
dengan apa yang kau beri
aku terdampar di sini
tersudut menunggu mati

aku tak percaya lagi
akan guna matahari
yang dulu mampu terangi
sudut gelap hati ini

aku berhenti berharap
dan menunggu datang gelap
sampai nanti suatu saat
tak ada cinta kudapat

kenapa ada derita
bila bahagia tercipta
kenapa ada sang hitam
bila putih menyenangkan
ooo..oooo

Chorus:
aku pulang...
tanpa dendam
kuterima.. kekalahanku
aku pulang...
tanpa dendam
kusalutkan.. kemenanganmu

bridge:
kau ajarkan aku bahagia
kau ajarkan aku derita
kau tunjukkan aku bahagia
kau tunjukkan aku derita
kau berikan aku bahagia
kau berikan aku derita
Back to chorus**