sorry

i'm beginning to hate myself....
bit by bit i could see it eats me from within....
where have this hatred come from....
all this anger exploding right in your face....
you deserve none of this shit...
but yet it continues to flow with so much force, i fell flat on my back....

i needed you more than ever...
but yet i'm pushing you further away....
each and everytime...
why....
is it a sign...
that we were never meant to be...

i abused you...
i misused you...
i'm becoming the one thing that i hated most....

at the same time, i want to love you...
cradle you in my arms...
protect you...
but ended up...
hurting you myself...

i've ever dreamt of the most perfect moment....
you and me spending the rest of our lives together....

and

i've ever dreamt of the most awful moment....
you left....

this really is the lowest point in my life...



//stabbing me right at the heart